frm da pages of an old diary

Riding on a hope is like livin a psuedo dream,
the difference is when hopes are shattered, the pain overpowers the scream.
Iam left wonderin where did i go wrong.....wait
     desperately i tried to clinch the fate.
no......... that can't be happening.... i've put in
too much effort ...do u have any idea?
I've given the best part of my life and I shall not retreat.
I've come dis far and refuse to accept defeat.
Somewhere the heart is hesistant to walk again,
but as if nw i have any choice to refrain.
Can antbody tell me how to start,
         with a bleeding heart.
My psych says" its a phase...it will pass"
  but hangon you didnt tell what to do with the past.
Past is gone, futher brooding will cause more agony
   walking again and gettin a grip...
..........will silence the anguish of mental cacophony